SLICE Literary Writer’s Conference 2019 (Brooklyn, New York, September 7-8)
Thanks to a scholarship from the Maine Writers and Publishers Alliance (MWPA)--the Ilgenfritz Scholarship, WOOHOO!!!--I was able to attend this amazing conference! And it was my first time in New York City! I was able to see bits and pieces of NYC: Grand Central Terminal and Midtown (including Times Square--that's in Midtown, right?), the subway (many times), the New York Public Library, Central Park, bits of Brooklyn the Brooklyn Bridge, and the Statue of Liberty from the Staten Island Ferry. It was surreal, actually seeing these iconic places that I’ve previously only read about or seen in so many visual media forms. But the city was just a backdrop for the real show: the SLICE Literary Conference! From the warm greeting in the lobby of St. Francis College to the opportunities to mingle and met other writers, the atmosphere of the conference was one of inclusiveness and welcome. Most of the learning opportunities were one-hour panels of authors/agents/publishers talking about either the craft side of writing or the business side of writing. It was so helpful to hear about elements of a query letter from a group of agents, or the importance of a platform from a publishing marketing/sales/promotion team, or how authors stay inspired and productive--from the authors themselves. Highlights of the weekend included a workshop on structure with Ted Thompson (super helpful!!), and author interviews with Mira Jacobs and T Kira Madden. These two amazing writers talked about their process and struggles and how their writing stems from wrestling with the hard questions that they can’t shake. At one point Mira Jacobs said that when she was writing about hurtful experiences, she focused on writing for clarity, not for vindication. “I’m not trying to explain what a monster looks like; I’m trying to explain what love looks like,” she said. As a writer still finding my intentional arcs when writing personal narratives, her words resonated with me, helping me understand how and why emotionally-fraught impulses can be so easy to turn into an expose or vengeance, and how to instead focus on them as opportunities for healing and authenticity. Now back in Maine, I have a notebook full of notes and a folder full of handouts and a mind full of impressions and memories. This was truly an amazing experience! I’m so grateful that I was given the means and opportunity to attend. Thank you, MWPA!!
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Another entry from the archives of my writing journal, this one from December 2015. This was my biggest breakthrough as a writer up until that point. And actually, is still!
When I think about doing something but don't actually do it, a lot of negative thought can pile on to the task. This is especially true about writing. When I start thinking about writing instead of actually doing it, I can get into such a low, mucky place that I have given a name to it: the Monster. It's heavy and mean and has horrible teeth that grab onto my ankles and suck me down into a pit of doubt. THINKING about writing (or anything challenging or unknown) often clogs my mind full of...
But if I can shake off thinking mode and get myself to into doing mode, if I can actually sit down and write, do it instead of just thinking about it, the monster will often crawl away with its head down, leaving me alone until our next round. DOING writing often leads to:
This lovely outcome happens when I'm present and focusing on the process, but it can all fall apart in a hurry when I get focused on the results; that is, thinking about what I'm doing while I'm doing it. GAH! Then I try to remember: the Monster is just thoughts. That’s all it is. All I need to do is write, let it unfold moment by moment, no past, no future, just now, and the Monster thoughts will lose their hold. Bye, bye little Monster!! In honor of Camp NaNoWriMo, April and July 2017- 2019
As I was looking through my writing journal, I found this old entry written in the middle of my very first Camp NaNoWriMo--which was also my first foray into any kind of public writing forum. Up until April 2017, I wrote alone. (Well, with my cat, of course. But involving other people: nope.) I didn't share what I was writing or thoughts about writing with other writers, even on-line. Only a few people knew I was writing a book, and I wouldn't tell them what it was about. But that all began to change, with one simple step out of isolation, and with it, a whole new way of looking at things: April 17, 2017: By imagining/thinking that this book is possible, by creating a visual with my book cover and all of my notes and folders in one space and by creating a space specifically dedicated to this project, by joining a community of others that are also writing, by having specific goals, by making time for writing and making it a part of my day, all of these things are messages to me of possible--of not just choosing to focus on that state of reality with my thinking and actions, but also actually creating that state of reality by my thinking and actions. I think that one of the reasons that it’s so easy to stray from possible to impossible, is that reason: both states exist all the time, together, and there can be so many ways we can move from possible to impossible in the space of a single day. A badly written chapter, hearing statistics about how hard it is to get published, a crisis as work or home, feeling down about yourself for some reason that carries over to other parts of you…and while most of us are busy with our lives, which can be enough to pull you away from “possible” some of us have rather extreme thinking/polarized thinking, and/or low self-esteem, and/or tendencies to depression, so moving from “possible” to “impossible” is going to be part of our writing journey. We just have to keep moving back to possible and taking care to limit those things that throw us off course, and having things in place to pull us back on course, like belonging to a writing community. When I started writing full-time, I was sure I was focused and hard-working enough to do it; after all, I had been working intense 10-hours shifts at my job, and had been consistent about revising my book on my days off. And I knew it would be worth trying because writing had been my happy place for years. Writing felt like driving a car down a sunny country road, while going back to work the next day was like suddenly being stuck in traffic. I wanted to feel like I was driving that country road every day.
Right away, working full-time on my book felt different from when it had been just a few days a week. After a month of full-time revising, I was frustrated that my writing felt less like a pretty road of trees and open fields and more like a street full of pot holes and abandoned houses. And worse, I was less productive—it was like I was pushing the car, Flintstone-style, with my own two feet. What happened? If writing for a few days of week was so engaging, why was writing every day not? I wasn’t working more hours than before or more intensely than before, just on something different. And that different thing was supposed to be my work happy place. I kept pushing through. I told myself that I was just in a rough spot, that writing is just hard sometimes. I kept hoping that it would become less sloggy. It did not. I was starting to think I’d made a colossal mistake. And then I began taking a class, and something interesting happened: I started finding my happy place again with my book. My writing car picked up speed and moved back onto smooth pavement. Something about this new schedule was making a positive difference in my energy, focus, interest, and enjoyment for everything I was doing. What was it? Meg Selig, in her article for Psychology Today “GIVE ME A BREAK!” lists benefits of taking breaks, including an increase in productivity and creativity, restoring motivation, and preventing “decision fatigue.” This applies to real breaks, like taking a walk or chatting with a friend, but can it apply to changing work tasks? Yes, in part. In the same article, Selig further notes: “If you can’t take a break, consider switching work tasks. Changing your focus—say from writing an essay to choosing photos or a presentation--can often feel like a break because you are using a slightly different part of your brain…When you return to the original task, you’ll experience some of the break benefits.” Ah-ha! The act of alternating types of work every day was allowing enough of a change for my brain to be productive, motivated, and engaged again. And since making a living as a writer is tenuous enough without adding the inability to work full-time, I’m grateful that I stumbled on to this method of productivity. As I play with this new way of creating balance, here are some things that have been helpful:
"Are you a writer or an author?"
I used to think this simply meant the difference between being unpublished or published. That's not untrue, but I'm beginning to realize that it's not that simple. Elizabeth Atkinson talks about the publishing process as "introverts being expected to be extroverts." Jennifer Crusie has said that getting published is like taking a piece of art and turning it into a can of soup, and if you can't make that transition, publishing is going to break your heart. Lynda Mullaly Hunt recently told a roomful of hopeful author-wannabes that being an author is about the business side of writing, while being a writer is the about the creative side. And she urged us to protect this creative core of ourselves, to not let it get swallowed up by the business of being published. Good advice, but how is it possible if you want to be a writer and an author? The 30-70 Rule (presented by Elizabeth Atkinson -- Nov 2018 post) is a time guide that a lot of authors keep in mind as a matter of practicality: 30% of their time is used for actual writing and 70% on promotion/sales/ submissions/social media/etc. That's 70% of the time not writing!!! How is it possible to hold your writing self intact if you spend such a small percentage of your time actually focusing on it? Six months ago, I quit my job and plunged into a "writing walkabout" to discover more about why I write, and to see if it could it be a real vocation. The discoveries of these last months have gone beyond far my expectations as I've taken classes and workshops, and tried all kinds of new writing (I even tried stand-up comedy!). The main thing that has happened, the wonderful thing that has happened, is that I have discovered that not only do I love writing, but I love it in a whole new and more complex way than I could have realized even a year ago, and can see that growing and developing as I continue to learn and write. So writing? YES!!!!!!! But authoring? Hmmmm... Have you ever read the acknowledgements at the back of a book? That long, long list of people involved in getting a book to press? Those lists intimidate the heck out of me. That's so many people, so many steps, so much work and time. My stomach starts to cramp up thinking of all the emails and revisions and meetings and input and PEOPLE! All those people! And that's after you do all the submission work and find an agent/publisher! At least I know I'm in good company. I'm not the only one who'd like to pass on all the authoring stuff and just sit at my computer with the sunshine or the rain or the snow outside my window, drinking tea and creating worlds and letting characters romp through them. Or sitting on my bed in my pajamas, not even officially up for the day because I had a spark of an idea as I woke up, so I'm sitting there writing and writing as a new story emerges, thousands of bright-winged words spilling out as I lose track of time. And then my book would magically revise itself, perfectly phrased and typo-free, and morph a lovely cover and lightly textured pages of recycled, non-chlorine-bleached paper, and somehow, osmosis-like, end up in bookstores and libraries, and no one would actually read except for people who LOVED it, so I didn't ever have to worry about pesky things like critics or social media trolls, or if my family or friends liked it or not. **SIGH** I'll keep hoping! :) Meanwhile, as my writing walkabout is ending (practicality demands it!) and I step out again into the unknown, I'll try to focus on the usual: finding balance, staying open to possibilities and opportunities, and doing things one step at a time. And making sure that no matter what authoring might be in my future, that I always remember to make room for what I really love: writing! When: May 3, 4, 5
Where: Springfield, Massachusetts Who: SO MANY WRITERS!!! What: Keynotes and workshops and pitches, oh my! This was my first official conference for the Northeast Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators (NESCBWI) and it blew my socks off! They kept us very busy--I have a notebook full of scribbles that I'm now decoding, gleaning all those gems of information passed on by industry professionals from picture book writers, middle-grade and young adult writers, and agents and editors. There were members there from as far away as Texas, travelling all the way to the east coast because the NESCBWI conferences are awesome! (You can see the details at https://newengland.scbwi.org/ ) Aside from the four workshops on Saturday and three on Sunday, and meeting other aspiring authors, my favorite part of the conference was the keynotes. While it's understandably frowned upon to pass along information learned at a workshop or conference, I think it would be okay to share a snippet of inspiration from the keynote speakers (and if I'm wrong, please let me know!) Jane Yolen, award-winning author of over 300 books for children, (including the How Do Dinosaurs... books) started off the conference on Friday evening. Among the inspiration she shared, I loved her focus on valuing the writing process, not the end product, because, Jane said, if you focus on the product, you will lose the joy of writing and you will burn yourself out. Patricia MacLachlan also spoke on Friday evening, in a fireside chat. Patricia is the author of one of my favorite books, Sarah Plain and Tall, and seeing her on stage was a trip--she's quite outspoken and funny and tart! I enjoyed her take on writing as "a wonderful way to make a living" because you can take naps, hang with the cat, drink...and find joy (because of the writing, not the drinking. Or...maybe both?). Saturday, the keynote speaker was Lynda Mullaly Hunt, a middle-grade author who spoke about being vulnerable in writing, as she found herself doing at a whole new, uncomfortable level with her newest book Shouting at the Rain. Lynda had so many great quotes (my notebook is a solid mass of scribbles!) but one that resonated with me was: "It's not who you think you are that holds you back. It's who you think you are not" --a quote attributed to Denis Waitley. And finally on Sunday, Euka Holmes closed the conference. EUKA HOLMES, y'all! She spoke with the kind amazing energy and warmth that is reflected in her art and told us about specific books that she illustrated and her process of creation. One thing she shared was something her mother always told her: "Don't get ahead of yourself, don't let yourself get overwhelmed. Just do the next thing, whatever that may be." I loved that! Good advice for any endeavor! So now the conference is over, and while I'm still processing everything, I am also considering the next steps in my own writing journey. As I move forward, I hope to hold on to the inspiration that I gained from the people above, who've been there, done that, and triumphed. I hope to hold on to the inspiration to enjoy the process, take naps because I can, not limit myself, and "just do the next thing, whatever that my be." For years, I did not show anyone anything I wrote--ever! But in the last six months, I have come out of the writing closet and participated in three different workshops in which I not only let people see something I wrote, I listened to them discuss it! GAH!!!! Talk about nerve-wracking! Thankfully, my workshops were, for the most part, positive experiences. And although I have learned to be a bit wary, both of what I hear and for how I offer feedback to others, I do think there is value in workshopping.
A workshop is a type of critique group that allows a writer to get constructive feedback on a piece of writing. Usually the piece is distributed before the workshop to give participants time to read and annotate everyone else's work (which will then be given to the writer later), and then the group meets to discuss the story, poem, essay, etc. The workshop discussion usually includes a writing professional (teacher, editor, author) and peers working at a similar level to you (classmates, other writers). Although workshopping a piece is meant to provide constructive feedback for the writer to make the piece better, that's not always what ends up happening. In her book about creative writing, Method and Madness, Alice LaPlante writes "The results of a workshop can be magical, or brutal, or extraordinarily helpful, or ludicrously unhelpful, or all of the above. It depends on who is in the class, who is leading the workshop, and the particular story being discussed." The person in charge of the workshop will make a huge difference in the tone and productivity of the group. If the leader is emphatic about using positive feedback and gently worded questions to the writer, then the workshop can be an affirmation of what the writer is doing well. This is also dependent on the participants' willingness to strive for positivity, and on the group leader being able to reign in anyone that is being too enthusiastic/too negative in sharing their point of view. An emphasis on positive comments can backfire, though, if participants are just trying to find something about which to comment. When directed to find things you like about a story, it is possible to go overboard and wax a little too enthusiastically about a plot point or character just because you feel the need to say something. Reading to find things you like can actually help you find more good points than if you are not looking, and it's okay to mention them in workshop, time allowing. LaPlante mentions another pitfall that workshoppers can fall into when they don't know what else to say: asking to see more of something. "I'd love to see more dialogue" or "It would be great to have more background on the mother" are examples of this kind of feedback. Again, these kinds of comments can be helpful, but are another example of something to suggest if it's your authentic observation/interest, and not because you are looking for something to say. Do you really want to know more about why the dog barks so much, or are you just not sure what else to say? However, some workshops aren't focused on asking for more of anything or showering you with happy thoughts, and some participants don't want that. Madison Smartt Bell in his book Narrative Design, writes, "The fiction workshop is designed to be a fault-finding mechanism; it’s purpose is to diagnose and prescribe." Often, a member of the group can feel pressure (self-imposed or outwardly-imposed) to look knowledgeable and participatory by finding as many "flaws" as possible and pointing them out. And if the class is determined to find everything they possibly can that is "wrong" with the piece, the writer had better have some thick skin. Which way is better--unbridled positivity, or full-frontal flaw finding? Either way, it's important to take ANY feedback, positive or negative, with a grain of salt. It's possible to get so much advice--and often contradictory advice--about what you should or could do to "improve" piece that it can be hard to know where to start. Bell notes that some of his students tried to incorporate all the advice they received...and ended up with "second drafts that very likely had less obvious flaws than the first, but also a whole lot less interest. These revisions tended to live up to commonly heard, contemptuous descriptions of workshop work being well-tooled, inoffensive, unexceptional, and rather dull." Now that I've participated in a few workshops and know some of the pitfalls, I find that I'm less adamant about expressing my opinion and trying to appear like I know what I'm talking about, or caring as much about what others are telling me. So will I continue to workshop? Yes! Workshopping can be an extremely helpful way to learn what is confusing, distracting, or seems out of place with the rest of a piece. And I do appreciate positive feedback--we all love to hear the good stuff!! And there have been unexpected benefits to workshopping: Participating in workshops has pushed me to be a better reader. I'm normally a critical reader, but by reading original stories looking for things to like, I'm finding that there's so much more depth and interest and enjoyment than I realized. Another benefit is seeing writing come to life, a la Reader Response Theory. This is the idea that writing is a living thing that only comes alive when we read it and interpret it through our own unique worldviews and experiences. To hear how someone else interprets a story and discuss it in a group has been fascinating and affirming of the writing process as a whole. When deciding to workshop, you don't get a choice about the format and the kind of feedback, so if it matters to you, you might want to know beforehand by doing some research. If you are in an entry level workshop, you are probably going to get the more positive type of feedback. Below, in case it's of interest, I have listed out details of the three workshops I've attended: Agent/Editor Day held by the Society of Children's Book Writers and Illustrators (October 2018) FORMAT:
Workshop with Elizabeth Peavey through the Maine Writers and Publishers Alliance (January 2019) FORMAT:
Creative Writing Class Workshop for Short Stories (February/March 2019) FORMAT:
Some quotes from authors about why they write: First, Terry Farish, author of a lovely book called The Good Braider. In this book, Farish uses lyric prose to experience the world through the eyes of another person, and her statement about why she writes reflects this exploration: I must take the time to In the introduction of The Gifts of Imperfection, author Brene Brown writes about the process of how she decided to write such a book. I love Brene Brown and I LOVE this book, but I already worry about what I'm writing being worthwhile, so I'm not sure I want to ask myself this! Is it necessary to worry about the worth of something? Is it enough to have the story and the impulse to draft and revise and share it? Before I start writing, I always ask myself, 'Why is this book worth writing? What's the contribution that I'm hoping to make? Author Barry Lopez seems to have less concern on considering the worth or merit of a piece of writing and instead embraces stories to care for and share as needed. The gentleness and openness of his philosophy is such a restful place in which to create. The stories people tell have a way of taking care of them. If the stories come to you, care for them. And learn to give them away where they are needed. In Rainbow Rowell's Fangirl, the protagonist, Cath, is a dedicated fanfiction writer and new college student reluctant to try writing anything original. In chapter two, Cath's creative writing classmates are discussing why they write: "To explore new worlds." "To explore old ones." "To set ourselves free." But while the class is throwing out ideas, Cath is thinking: "To get free of ourselves...To stop being anything or anywhere at all...To disappear." Later, in chapter 23, Cath's English professor talks to her directly about writing. Cath has still not tried writing anything original. I love their debate (in part, below) because it illustrates that there are so many ways to be immersed in writing. I think Cath's love of writing fanfiction is not less worthy than writing original work, but it's definitely a different process. Cath: |